You Might be a Liberal

The White Shark has been on an extended hiatus but is back and thought I’d have some fun.

You might be a liberal

…if you believe punishing your employer with higher taxes, brutal regulations, and insane union demands enhances your job security.
…if you believe marriage is an antiquated institution but that gay marriage is the issue for our day.
…if you believe that a cold blooded killer doesn’t deserve the death penalty but an inconvenient baby does.
…if you believe that the Constitution has magical protections for things like abortion and bathrooms for cross dressers but doesn’t matter where guns and religion are concerned.
…if you believe that government benefits are the path to prosperity.
…if you believe that voter I.D. is racist but I.D. to get food stamps and government benefits is okay.
…if you believe that Christianity is the greatest evil in the history of mankind while mass murdering atheist regimes have nothing to do with atheism.
…if you believe that Jesus wasn’t real and that the inquisition murdered millions.
…if you believe that the United States of America has a terrible human rights record while China, North Korea, and Cuba have been bastions of tolerance and kindness.
…if you believe that you can spend your way out of debt.
…if you believe the government has its own money.
…if you believe that a tax cut that reduces the tax burden on those who pay the most is unfair to those who pay nothing.
…if you believe that Ronald Reagan was an idiot and Barack Obama is a genius.
…if you are sitting at home with no job because unreasonable union demands caused your plant to close down and move but that the problem was the evil business.
…if you think that NBC, ABC, CBS, and CNN are centrist but that FOX is way to the right.
…if you believe that MSNBC is something more than low brow comedy.
…if you believe that Bill Maher’s show which puts an idiot and two liberals against one moderate is an example of a fair fight on the issues.
…if you believe that Bill O’Reilly is a right wing nut job.
…if you believe that Al Gore actually did invent the internet.
…if you believe that climate change has never occurred before the industrial revolution.
…if you believe that liberals think for themselves while conservatives are brainwashed by the Bible and talk radio.
…if you believe that killing baby seals is bad but killing baby humans is okay.
…if you believe that Christianity is a religion of war but Islam is a religion of peace.
…if you believe that racist and misogynistic remarks by liberals are okay if their heart is in the right place.
…if you believe that Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton deserve the title of reverend.